For those of you who don’t know
I started a new “day job” as a technical writer for a local company here in the Lou. I was all over it because I want to improve my writing skills in any way I can, and a steady paycheck offers a bit more padding than the staggering numbers that royalties offer. When a month is good, it’s GOOD, but when sales dip…(don’t ask me to finish that sentence haha)
This is part of why I struggle with the idea of making money off of my self-expression.
When you turn art into a business it’s difficult to keep the creative flow free from outside influences. I’ve spent a great amount of energy working my ass off to make sure that what I write is still “me” no matter who my publisher is, what the stats look like, and how rough some critiques can be. (Of course taking helpful pointers to improve is always something I strive to do.)
Writers are tightrope walkers. We have to hold our own against gusts of wind in the form of societal pressures.
I’ve been one hell of a lucky bitch in my career. The stars seem to keep smiling on me as I progress. (I don’t know why, honestly I know I’m not the greatest writer out there and I fear I will never be as good as I am working toward.)
When I decided to seek a full time, steady paying writing position, I didn’t actually know if I had a shot at all. But I went for it. That’s how I do. I’d rather try and fail than sit around wondering if I could’ve done more.
Writing for a living
Tomorrow I get to wrap up week two of my new job and I am glad to be where I’m at. My co-workers are awesome, the hours are great, and I get to write.
I’m settling in nicely
But I have feared that staring at a computer screen writing for eight hours a day would affect my abilities to keep up with the other aspects of my career. That’s good. I love fear. Fear is my best friend. I take all the concerns and funnel them into fuel to make sure that I keep working. I can’t give up now. Now is the time to gear up and push harder than ever.
Yeah, my brain’s exhausted when I get home, but I make a healthy dinner for me and my girls and spend a couple of hours playing games, dancing, and hanging out with them before they go to bed. Once they’re out, my time is for me. The creative, crazy, dream sparked me.
Technical writing is very concise, analytical. It does not drain my creative juices. If anything it balances me out me.
When I get home, I crave the time when I get to let the other half of my personality take over and generate new stories, or re-construct old ones. Some nights I devote to editing; last night I finished a book review for The Horror Zine, tonight I’m doing a blog, and tomorrow I’ll probably start something new (thanks to wine and the excitement of New Years).
There is one super annoying downfall: Time refuses to stand still. Bastardo! haha
I cannot let writing stop me from writing
Which means I have to make sure I utilize every minute of my time properly. Family and close friends can’t take a back seat to this, so the main thing that seems to be getting cut down on is blogging.
I know, I know, dry your eyes my loyal readers.teehee I will always do my best to post at least 2 or 3 times a week, but for now the everyday me-ness on here will have to sit on hold. (Unless anyone wants to volunteer to become my personal assistant, I can’t pay you, but I will send baked goods once a week. heehee)
I can’t guarantee they’ll all be gingerbread Cthulhus, but…
I consider it quality over quantity.
My stories will not suffer, and that is what is most important in this (excluding family and such of course). I have so many irons in the fire, you guys wouldn’t believe. This next year is going to be another big one for me.
I refuse to let it be anything else.